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"Our politicians have one thing in common."
"Corrupt, engaged in nepotism and..."
"Those are charges against the status quo parties and I guess I would include all except Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf in that category because they have not partaken of the fruits of being in the federal government yet."
"Fruits come with thorns... but how about incompetence? Would you include PTI in that?"
"Well, incompetence is better than corruption isn't it?"
"Not sure... an incompetent government can do more damage than a corrupt one. I mean between 2008-13 things were not as bad as now in terms of inflation, in terms of heavier reliance on foreign borrowing, in terms..."
"Hey, that's the cumulative effect if you know what I mean."
"I guess its all relative but the one thing in common is that all our politicians have really not worked in the conventional labour market. I mean the Sharifs and the Zardaris and the Bhutto Zardaris, the Maulanas, the Asfandyars and the..."
"Hey, Khan worked in cricket - though that too is not a conventional job."
"Agreed, but the cumulative effect of this has been our politicians' inability to understand the problems of those of us who work for a wage..."
"You are wrong they do: which is why our politicians tax us, and not themselves!"
"Hmmm, but I reckon all our party leaders want to form the government."
"Indeed that is the terms of reference of all political parties - and in spite of protestations to the contrary the fact is that the objective is to gain and then keep power."
"Right, but they have another thing in common which is unique to Pakistani politicians: their love of containers. Rehman Malik and Chaudhry Nisar have in spite of all differences a love for containers that is evident - you only have to be in Islamabad these days to know that. Then there is Imran Khan and Tahirul Qadri both in containers - I mean their workers are not allowed containers so the equality they talk of...."
"What do you want? Hundreds of containers along the road to the PM House to accommodate all the marchers?"
"The numbers would depend on who gets to share with how many..."
"You are being facetious."
"Remember the words of the French revolution: liberty, equality, fraternity?"
"Our revolutionaries are not that ambitious: liberty is about it and liberty from Nawaz Sharif and company."
"You are being facetious."

Copyright Business Recorder, 2014

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